Stop Holding Your Breath: How Healing Starts with Letting Go
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Hey, friend hey! I HOPE YOU ARE WELL! This week has been great for me. Thank God! 🎉 Now let's get into the reason why I'm writing to you! It’s been four years since my father’s passing, and I must say the grief process has changed—for the better. I no longer cry at the thought of him. I am satisfied with what we had and what he left me with. Because I’ve stopped holding my breath and rethinking yesterday, I’ve given myself permission to accept, experience, and enjoy today. It’s been a long journey, y’all. There’s something strange that happens when your parent transitions. It’s almost as if the earth quakes constantly, and your emotions feel shuffled. The world looks so different inside of grief, and so many people begin to withhold…
What does the process of withholding point to? SCARCITY. And scarcity is rooted in fear—fear of not being enough or not having enough for today or tomorrow. Are you picking up what I’m putting down? Some of you may be thinking, “Sybil, why are you sharing this with us this week?” I’m sharing this because so many times we’re holding our breath and don’t realize or understand why. Many of you have experienced some form of loss that pulled you into a pattern of withholding instead of healing. Some people think that healing can be put on hold. I disagree to the 12th degree! Whether it’s the end of a marriage, a partnership, a job transition, a bad investment, a friendship failure, or the loss of a loved one, grief can be both heavy and haunting. Grief can distract you from the gift of the present and the people who are in place to love you. It can shackle you to fear, making you overlook your abundance. If that’s you, let me encourage you to commit to healing your heart and clearing your mind. For me to heal through my father's passing, I had to accept that I would never be the same Sybil I was before. I had to stop expecting life to get back to “normal” because my normal had evolved. I needed to accept how I feel and how I approach the world today. I had to be honest, frequently, about my emotions and expect those feelings to be honored by the people in my life. I needed patience with myself, to embrace the time and attention healing requires. And I had to set new terms for myself and my relationships. Casual love and acceptance were no longer acceptable—I deserve active, evident love from those in my life. And most importantly, I learned to stop holding my breath. When we hold our breath, we’re denying ourselves the fullness of life, the joy of living in the now. We’re too focused on managing loss or fear to inhale deeply, exhale fully, and experience the richness of each moment. Letting go of that instinct to hold your breath allows for a new kind of freedom—a freedom to heal without needing others to validate your progress, a freedom to breathe without fearing what’s next. I’m not doing well because everyone says, “You seem great!” or “You’re looking better.” I’m doing well because I accept myself at all times, in all ways. That acceptance gave me the room to heal without waiting for external validation. Back to you… Here are three ways to give yourself the emotional space you need to heal through transitions:
Grief may never fully go away, but healing makes room for the beauty of today and the possibilities of tomorrow. Until next time, I encourage you to give yourself grace, allow space for growth, and embrace the love you deserve. I'm cheering you forward from victory to victory, Ways to support this newsletter:📚 Buy my e-book Ready.Set.Go! Five Simple Keys for Overcoming Self Sabotage ✨ Listen to The Great Girlfriends Show ✨ Subscribe to The Great Girlfriends YouTube Channel ☕️ Buy me a coffee |